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Full Description
How to avoid being a helicopter parent--and raise well adjusted, truly independent children In an age of entitlement, where most kids think they deserve the best of everything, most parents are afraid of failing their children. Not only are they all too willing to provide every material comfort, they've also become overly involved in their children's lives, becoming meddlesome managers, rather than sympathetic advocates. In Drop the Worry Ball , authors Alex Russell and Tim Falconer offer a refreshing approach to raising well-adjusted children--who are also independent and unafraid to make mistakes. In this practical sensible book, parents will truly understand the dynamics between parents and their children, especially the tendency of children to recruit their parents to do too much for them. The book also counsels that failing--whether it's a test, a course, or a tryout for a team--is a natural part of growing up, and not a sign of parental incompetence.Shows how to resist the pressure to become over involved in your child's life How to retire as a gatekeeper or manager of your child's life, and become a genuine source of support Build trusting relationships with teachers, coaches, camp counselors, and other authority figures--so they can play an effective role in your child's life Understand problems such as ADHD, anxiety, and substance abuse A guidebook for parenting courageously and responsibly--allowing your kids to be who they are while building structures that keep them safe-- Drop the Worry Ball is a must for any parent who wishes to be and do their very best.
Contents
Introduction 1 Chapter 1 -- Parenting from the Bench 7 Hockey Dad 8 Children Once Grew Up; Now We Raise Them 11 The Island Family and the Family Island 15 Childhood Revolution 17 What We Worry About 22 The Worry Ball 26 Painful, Non-Catastrophic Failure 28 The Park Bench 30 Chapter 2 -- Obligated Parents and Entitled Kids 35 The Age of Entitlement 39 Getting Perspective 42 Whose Problem Is It? 46 Minding versus Acting 48 Too Much of a Good Thing 51 Stories of Woe 53 Chapter 3 -- "I Don't Want to Grow Up" 61 The Problem of Reality 65 The Terrible Twos 68 Power Struggles 71 Master and Slave 75 Gaining Respect 80 Chapter 4 -- School and the "Looming Conveyor Belt of Life" 89 "Will This Be on the Exam?" 92 Trusting Teachers 94 Please and Appease 97 Don't Be a Homework Cop 101 Finding Flow 104 Minding the Children 107 Chapter 5 -- Sex, Drugs and Video Games 115 Doomed to Fail 120 Being Bad 124 Scary Digital Age 129 The Handheld Danger 132 The Book on Facebook 135 Being Interested 136 Chapter 6 -- Cheering Failure 145 Teenage Wasteland 147 United We Stand; Divided We Fall 150 The Two-Headed Parenting Monster 154 External Authority 158 Beyond Praise 160 Everyone Screws Up 164 Chapter 7 -- Disabilities, Disorders and Disasters 171 Special Needs in Childhood 175 Learned Helplessness 177 Illnesses, Disorders and Labels 180 Frontal Lobes 184 Avoidance Disorder--Not Otherwise Specified 187 Suicide 192 A Happy Ending for Philippe 196 Chapter 8 -- Building a Village 201 The Tree Fort 204 The Ingredients of a Village 206 Us Against Them 209 Safety Second 214 Over-Caring 216 Sharing the Load 218 Chapter 9 -- Building an Adult 223 Looking After Yourself 226 From Child to Adult 228 Some Essential "Scraped Knees" of Childhood: When a Child Can Handle What 232 Parental Perspective = A Confident Child 237 Doing Your Best 241 Acknowledgments 245