Full Description
'Mothering, at every turn, is about being mothered. Everywhere in the wilderness I hear the cries of other mothers. I call back to them, asking for help, but sometimes they can't hear me through their own cries'
In the aftermath of a prolonged labour and traumatic birth, Ayşegül Savaş feels lost to herself and disconnected from her baby. Overwhelmed and exhausted, she struggles to heal from the birth, both physically and emotionally, and feels invisible to her loved ones, who are seemingly more interested in the baby than her. It is only by accepting help from others that Savaş begins to establish a new normal and regain control over her life.
In many cultures and religions, forty days is seen as a period of trial and transformation and often involves journeys into the wilderness. In her debut essay, Savaş reflects on the raw and transformative wilderness of the first forty days of motherhood - a space of contradiction, of chaos and care, of mothering and being mothered.
